December 3, 2008

• Friendship deepened

        This last Friday was interesting.  A friendship that I have had since college came to a point of needing to talk one on one as the talk could make or break the friendship. I had tried to talk a few months prior alone but it did not seem to resolve anything. This time I brought another person who we both valued. She did not like the fact the third person was coming due to she had an experience where several friends before had bombarded her with facts of her life and it did not go well for her friendships with them since. Years I ago I heard from both sides in general terms of the situation but some of same issues were driving the wedge in our existing friendship.  I tried to tell myself she just didn't understand where they had been getting at and informed the third person a little about the years back in order for understanding to build this girl up not destroy her. I wanted her to remain as freinds despite what it has been building up to.

        Praise the Lord!  She was not thrilled when we arrived as she reminded me of the previous encounter of years ago with more than one person came to talk with her.  In ways, it seemed like she was expecting the worse with her eyes determined not to be the underdog. I valued her as a friend and our mutual friend did also as we had this meeting not to lose her as a friend despite some actions going on.

       Praise the Lord for the mutual friend there that help both of us explain the other that much more and able to have a third person veiw on the situation despite only being friends for aprox 3 years.  We were not there to attack her but to say we loved her and stand up to her gently. I was able to bring up the past only as an example in some things that had not changed in life. I think in ways she was able to see things she had not been able to see then as she has aged and the mutual friend pointing out things still similiar and destructive. Yet, better understanding was needed ON ALL OF US. No human on this earth currently is perfect in friendship. If we did not talk this out, I do believe this last bit could have destroyed the friendship. Frustration has a way to be destructive.  Yet, the friendship is stronger now due to the conversation we had Friday night and peace is there.  That night turned out to be encouragement for both of us.

       I have had similiar situations/talks with others that have not gone as well. Yet, this friend had sincere faith in Jesus and lives trying to please God.  She is a really good girl who has been waiting for God to work in her life in certain areas. She has followed God's way instead of the world's way in lots of things. I dreaded that talk in what could result from it if it didn't go well. At times, I have fear instead of faith!!! My bad!!! My failing! Yet, the mutual friend who truly cared for both sides did really help the situation in being able to present additional facts/situations in a caring way yet not afraid to state the unpleasant to get to the point.  We asked God to help us fix the situation not end it.

       Friday night was an encouragement of what was to come during the next days.  Some people would rather destroy others out of greed, jealousy, and more through manipulation/control.  My big problem is keeping my mouth shut at times for years and endure things. I pray instead of act at times.  I keep my mouth shut instead of speaking up when I know I need to in hopes of peace from it. I keep forgetting about the choice God gives to people to chose how they live their lives. In the last few months I have learned that keeping your mouth shut can give you regret later in life due to things can only get worse over the years. Can it ever be too late to stand up? Too much damage/destruction done by others as I have kept quiet? I may say a few things but not enough to ever make the difference?  "With God all things are possible'' !!!!! I can't forget that! There is a time to speak and a time to pray.  People will make their choices. I must remember it is God who changes the heart of another not humans when it comes Him.

       I do praise the Lord for the friendship that grew deeper Friday night.  I do need her sincere frienship and fellowship with God!  The three of us grew closer and know God will bless it! No voices were raised as the air was cleared. No human is perfect but forgiven when confess things before God.

  • 11:24 pm
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