A phone call interrupts the bliss of sleep.

Yet words from a friend taste so sweet.

 Before I grumble, I realize a truth.

 A load of laundry fits in nicely.

A gift with time so well used.

To return to  sweet bliss of sleep.

     I say I have faith. Yet, if I worry or fret it shows lack of faith. I have been dealt a measure of faith found in Romans 12:3. Yet, it is up to me the choice to use it. I have it in areas,  yet weak in others.

     Promises in the Word are there to stand on like Philippains 4:4-9 is true. It has given me strength and peace many a time. Yet, it is like I forget I even know it exists at times as I live. Yet, I don't stand but seem to run.

     When I walk out the door from the house to wherever and forget something I need. Why did I forget it? Distracted? It happens with things and it seems to happen with scripture too as I walk in life.

    Praise the Lord that He forgives! I may still have the consquences of lack of sleep due to worrying. Yet, I can chose to stand then on His Word.

    Praise the Lord that He uses people to encourage us even if we are worrying. Some may not realize how they are wonderfully used at moments in life. Despite a worry, I can still have a partial faith that knows it will be okay in time but at the moment I lose my way. Sometimes when one is so tired and late at night can be a weak time but God still cares as He can use anyone at anytime.

     A pen and paper note has a beauty to it a computer never will. One can convey emotions written in the  ink as the hand moves.  Once you write with a pen the words stay on the paper not to disappear with a wrong key stroke. There is something dear about recieving that paper letter knowing the one who wrote it touched it as you do now. A paper letter able to keep it in an old shoe box to read it over and over again without having to log on.

     How many times today can we write a computer note only to lose it all with a bad key stroke. How many papers for school lost over the years? It is nice that Word started an automatic save. Yet, not all programs have such the gift.

     I hear a rumor that writing with fade from schools due to the computer skills of print. Generations will not learn to read the beautiful cherished letters of old with all the memories they hold share between others.  Grandmother's notes unable to be read to her generations beyond. Pages yellow and brittle with time that allow history to come alive of a personal life.

     Handwriting can be so beautiful as done by some with all the slopes and loops as they decorate the page. Some way, somehow, I am told I take after my Grandmother's style of writing with her loops and slopes. If relaxed, I write with a hand of old.  If rushed with notes, it becomes a code of barely readable chicken scratch. If I be half asleep it becomes a mess I can't even decode.

     Things change but those of us who know how to read and write will have a dying skill. Yet, one to be valued as it shows the beauty of human life.

 

   I rarely repost another one post but this week I asked her permission if I could repost her post. Razehell agreed. Her posts have challenged me for years.  I wanted to reccommend it but seemed to be unable to do that. Her post hit me between the eyes and stepped on my toes. A wake up for me to challenge to live stronger in faith. Today was a good day to do it. I have made several copies for my own reminders to put around. It is something to keep one humble and a challenge. For me it even answers some of my questions of "why?".  It challenged me. Praise the Lord He knows our heart's motives and will forgive us as we repent/turn/change from our wrong.

http://razehell.xanga.com/735490572/item/ 

 

by Rick Ezell

"I know your deeds, that you are neither cold nor hot. I wish you were either one or the other! ...you are lukewarm-neither hot nor cold" (Rev. 3:15, 16 NIV).

Jesus is saying that rather than "hot" or its synonym found in verse 19 "earnest" there is lukewarmness. William Hendriksen describes the condition: "The people of Laodicea were lukewarm, tepid, flabby, half-hearted, limp, always ready to compromise, indifferent, listless: that ‘we're-all-good-people-here-in-Laodicea‘ attitude." Shockingly, Jesus prefers coldness to lukewarmness.

How can you tell if a person is lukewarm? Here are twenty-one characteristics of lukewarm people. (Most of these are from Francis Chan in his book Crazy Love).

1. Lukewarm people attend church fairly regularly. It is what is expected of them; it is what they believe "good Christians" do, so they go. Isaiah 29:13.

2. Lukewarm people give money to charity and to the church as long as it doesn't intrude on their standard of living. If they have a little extra and it is easy and safe to give, they do so, After all, God loves a cheerful giver, right? 1 Chronicles 21:24, Luke 21:1-4.

3. Lukewarm people crave acceptance. They tend to choose what is popular over what is right when they are in conflict. They desire to fit in both at church and outside of church; they care more about what people think of their actions (like church attendance and giving) than what God thinks of their hearts and lives. Luke 6:26, Revelation 3:1, Matthew 23:5-7 4.

4. Lukewarm people don't really want to be saved from their sin; they want only to be saved from the penalty of their sin. They don't genuinely hate sin and aren't truly sorry for it; they're merely sorry because God is going to punish them. Lukewarm people don't really believe that this new life Jesus offers is better than the old sinful one. Consequently, they tolerate and rationalize unconfessed sin. John 10:10, Romans 6:1-2.

5. Lukewarm people are moved by stories of people who do radical things for Christ, yet they do not act. They assume such action is for "extreme" Christians, not average ones. Lukewarm people call "radical" what Jesus expected of all his followers. James 1:22, James 4:17, Matthew 21:28-31.

6. Lukewarm people rarely share their faith with their neighbors, coworkers, or friends. They do not want to be rejected, nor do they want to make people uncomfortable by talking about private issues like religion. Matthew 10:32-33.

7. Lukewarm people gauge their morality or "goodness" by comparing themselves to the secular world. They feel satisfied that while they aren't as hard-core for Jesus as so-and-so, they are nowhere as horrible as the guy down the street. Luke 18:11-12.

8. Lukewarm people say they love Jesus, and he is, indeed, a part of their lives, their money, and their thoughts, but he isn't allowed to control their lives. They have changed the words of their favorite hymn from "Take My Life and Let It Be" to "Take My Life and Let Me Be." Luke 9:57-62.

9. Lukewarm people love God, but they do not love him with all their heart, soul, and strength. They would be quick to assure you they try to love God that much, but that sort of total devotion isn't really possible for the average person; its only for pastors and missionaries and radicals. Matthew 22:37-38.

10. Lukewarm people love others but do not seek to love others as much as they love themselves. Their love for others is typically focused on those who love them in return, like family, friends, and other people they know and connect with. Little love is left over for those who cannot love them back, much less for those who intentionally slight them, whose kids are better athletes than theirs, or with whom conversations are awkward or uncomfortable. Their love is highly conditional and very selective, and generally comes with strings attached. Matthew 5:43-47, Luke 14:12-14.

11. Lukewarm people, in many respects, are practical atheists. While they believe in God they live as though God does not exist. They do not consult with him much less follow his leading.

12. Lukewarm people think about life on earth much more often than eternity in heaven. Daily life is mostly focused on today's to-do list, this week's schedule, and next month's vacation. Rarely, if ever do they intently consider the life to come. In fact, they are prone to say when asked "How are you doing?" "Not well, but better than the alternative," as though the alternative of sending eternity with Jesus is worse than life on this planet. Philippians 3:18-20.

13. Lukewarm people are thankful for their luxuries and comforts, and rarely consider trying to give as much as possible to the poor. Matthew 25:34, 40, Isaiah 58:6-7.

14. Lukewarm people do whatever is necessary to alleviate their guilt. They want to do the bare minimum, to be "good enough" without requiring too much of them. 1 Chronicles 29:14, Matthew 13:44-46.

15. Lukewarm people are continually concerned with playing it safe; they are slaves to the god of control. This focus on safe living keeps them sacrificing and risking for God. Matthew 10:28.

16. Lukewarm people feel secure because they attend church, made a profession of faith at age twelve, were baptized, come from a Christian family, vote Republican, or live in America.

17. Luke warm people do not live by faith; their lives are structured so they never have to. They don't have to trust God if something unexpected happens-they have their savings account. They don't need God to help them-they have their retirement plan in place. They don't genuinely seek out what life God would have them live-they have life figured and mapped out. They don't depend on God on a daily basis-their refrigerators are full and, for the most part, they are in good health. The truth is, their lives wouldn't look much different if they suddenly stopped believing in God. Luke 12:16-21.

18. Lukewarm people probably drink and swear less than average, but besides that, they really aren't very different from your typical unbeliever. They equate their partially sanitized lives with holiness, but they couldn't be more wrong. Matthew 23:25-28, Luke 14:34-35.

19. Lukewarm people pray more in public and when called upon than they do in private. Prayer means little to them. If it means anything to them it is a help line to God when things go wrong in their lives not a private conversation to know the God of the Universe.

20. Lukewarm people rarely read the Bible. They have plenty in their homes, mind you, but they seldom pick it up to read, let alone study or meditate on or follow its commands.

21. Lukewarm people get upset about the little stuff while being unconcerned about the big issues. In other words, they will get angry over being personally inconvenienced-especially at church-while indifferent to the plights of injustice, ethnic cleansing, and racial hatred that exist in the world.

What's frightening about these statements is that many of those statements apply to me. And, if we are honest, they apply to most people in our churches who call themselves Christians. At times I am lukewarm. Are you?

Francis Chan in his book Crazy Love adds: "As I see it, a Lukewarm Christian is an oxymoron; there's no such thing. To put it plainly, church goers who are lukewarm are not Christians. We will not see them in heaven." That's a frightening thought.

     Caged from actions to help others as I rode in a car as a front seat passenger with a friend, we drove by a fresh accident on this cold rainy night. Forced against my will to be driven by without stopping. I was ignored it my requests to stop to help these people unprotected by flashing lights from those who can pass by. I felt kidnapped as I was driven away from the scene.

     I had grabbed my cellphone while slowly driving by to call it in but saw several cell phones already lit up probably doing the same thing. I don't want to tie  up people at dispatch but wanted those working to be able to dispatch instead of taking more repeated calls of the same thing. Besides, I didn't know anything extra to add due to being forced to drive by without stopping.

     My trained eyes observed all were out of the two cars with minimal damage which could mean possibly no injuries. Yet, what concerned me was how the people were walking around in the dark unlit by any street lights. They could be possible victims yet by a car passing by on these slick wet streets.  Drivers gawking as they drive by but not really seeing the risks before it is too late. Yes, the speed on this street is decreased but by being hit a 30-40 mph in a certian way can still kill a fragile human body. A twinge in my own injury scares remind me of this when I was not seen at full highway speed.

     All I could do was pray and knew it is more powerful than what even I could do. In my own car I have packed in the back things to protect me and others if I should come upon a scene again.  Yet, we could have stopped in a safe spot and offered a warm place in a heated car to wait for those none injured till the officers showed with their protective flashing lights to illuminate the scene. It would not be long till the officers took over, but a few minutes is a few minutes of comfort in a frustrating on a accident scene. How many times I have I done this before in my own car? Or, even warned oncoming traffic in various ways?

     My friend could have stayed warm and dry in the car. I'm use to being wet and cold when out to help another and know I will dry and warm up later again. I have done this for way over a decade as it is like changing clothes. I grew up on a farm where you lived your workplace 24/7. This career only changed what I protected more with the training to chose to receive which helped humans in need. There are so many ways to encourage others in this world. Too many people stopping to help that don't know what to do can cause a far bigger problem than the accident itself. Yet, we all have our places and assignments in this world in ability to encourage others in so many various ways.

     I asked my friend why didn't we stop? The reply to me was that it would take too much time and left it at that with silence as I repeated it again. I informed it would only have been a few minutes if nobody was hurt but only a few more after that until a unit arrived to help if one was injured on scene. Part of me wanted to end any further plans that night but realized a deeper story in my life. I realized why I am single and few really close friends I have. There also were answers I have been praying for of why this and that. Singleness is a freedom to act when prompted to encourage others that come along my path. Yet people who I'm around can affect how I act as I try to please them than the call.

     I ignored the voice within to push to drive tonight. I had planned to drive but the friend wanted to drive instead. I should have pushed for my way then and would have solved the issues tonight. I need to learn to listen more to those promptings I receive instead of brushing them off to please others. How many times was I convicted of doing this before in life? A desire to be accepted by those in the world than do what I am called to do at times. I know I'm not alone in missing those little promptings of direction. I just don't want to become harden and not able to hear such promptings in my life. I know it is too easy to develope that deaf ear.

     Mac, a.k. a. Little Blessing, while on recent trip with me. He was playing with stacks of pillows. Of course he stopped being so interesting to appear like good kitty standing guard of the pillows. Just a few minutes before he was romping around with them. He is a good traveler. The headboard of the bed gives you an idea of his size.

      A fly had entered the room on to became a playmate with him as the fly zoomed and Mac batted at him. They would take rests from each other and start playing again as it lasted for days. A couple of times during the visit they tried to include me in the fun as I tried to sleep.  Quickly, they realized it was not a good idea due to the little time I was home to sleep while at the conference.  Despite all, Mac is having some fun besides looking at the windows of the view he is not use to. Each day when I came to the room his toys were in a new place as he is self entertained. Yet, it seems as soon as  he hears a key in the door, he knows to come to the door to greet me as I enter in. After a few minutes of attention he is off to play again.

     He reminds me of faith. He trusts me to provide for him as I should trust Jesus to provide for me. They way he can look at me warms me to my toes. For those who know do understand what I say in reguards in comparisions I learn with this. Mac knows I love him and don't want anything to happen to him despite some of the things we do together. Yet, at times he does not listen to a command as he does his own thing like a cat likes to do. How many times do I do it too? He shows me my ownself at times in my response to God.  It is amazing in what God can use to teach us lessons.

     Adjusting from a walker to a cane was something I never thought I would be doing in the middle age of life. Yet, I was grateful for the upgrade with aid in walking. It had been approximately 8 months since the death of my beloved Kitty who had been with me aproximately ten years. I had been told he was old when I picked him up from a vet who needed to find him a home. I was told he was not much interested in people but when I went to visit him at her home, this kitty was trying to climb up my leg into my arms. There was an instant attraction which was a start of a beautiful relationship. Yet, with his death, I resisted the thought of getting another cat.

     Receiving a call to go to a craft show to be shown a special kitten, I had many excuses not to go. I struggled in being in public with the cane and did not want to risk falling. Why, why, why echoed in my brain but I still showed up. Plus, I wanted out of my four walls besides my trips to therapy to get stronger to return to work.

     Arriving at the place to see this little kitten is a day I will remember. He was held by those giving him away with a warning that they didn't think another would want him or put up with his ways for long. He was born with a very large head which threatened the life of his mother and him due to being stuck in the birth canal. They feared lack of oxygen and he had been a slow "special" kitty compared to his little siblings. Yet, his blue little eyes in his black and grey tiger stripes made him a cutey. Yet, it was his eyes that followed me despite who held him in this circle. Who can resist cute little kittens just over 4 weeks old? His future looked bleaked due to  his developement next to his siblings and life not to be long. Who would really want a "special" kitty in this way? Cuteness can wear away when actions are challenging.

     His gaze did not leave me no matter who or how he was held as his head kept turning back to me. Was my heart even ready to love a little furry one again as I had before? How many times had I told myself no more?  Yet, those eyes that fastened to me and the future I heard for this little guy tore at my heart. Once in my arms he did not want to leave as he snuggled in close like duct tape secured in place. One hand for the cane and one for him as I walked to my car. All the way home he clunged to me like his last chance at life.

     At times, I was not the most stable one on my feet but his claws held tight. As I protected this little guy from his frightful fate he watched and protected me as I continued to heal. If I was up he was near my side or not more than 3 feet resting near me as I grew stronger to go to work again despite others thought. I did not give up on going back to a job that I was told was history to me repeatedly. Faith and God's promise of healing I clung to like this kitten clung tight with his claws to me. We both had predicted negative outcomes by humans around  us both. Never underestimate the power of prayer!!!

     That was in 2008, today a different outcome did create. I went back to work after six months and little kitten grew out of his many interesting traits. As I write this he is resting three feet away keeping an eye on my every move. If I move to get up he will follow my steps. He grew into his huge head with a healthy weight of 14 pounds of lovely soft kitty fur.  Some of those things we fight can become a great gift we don't expect.

     Each stood filling drinks politely at the convience store located on an interstate in a city. Neither knew the other as either could be local or passing through. Yet, one had on something medical which prompted the other to ask medical information from the one.

     "What if this. this. and this happens? Could it be this?" asks the one filling her drink  up with Dt. Coke and ice.

     "Yes, it could be. Plus, if you do this, this, and that it could trigger even more of this or that. Why?  Because I pray over this situation for myself. Who has time to be sick or down to get it dealt with?," replied the one who was pouring cherry flavor into her Dt. Mountain Dew to turn it red with flavoring. No ice for her due to she did not like diluted drink or much of other things in life. She liked her faith strong also without the dilution of worry or fret. Yet, she knew too well how easily it creeps in.

     "So true, I don't want to admit to it either as I pray for it and claim the verses of healing the Word of God gives. There are just times it acts up and you pointed out my diet mistakes, I did not even realize I had made today. I'm driving a truck from Chicago to ..........., " she replied as the crowd's hum around the counter overwhelmed her last few words. Yet,  her eyes smiled in realizing she had met someone similiar to her in faith and recieved an encouragement that she needed.

     "Jesus still uses Doctor's in amazing ways and you will know the time to see one out one out as our bodies tend to act up and our faith has its moments. Your drink is mine to get tonight as you pass through. One can have encouraging words but actions to go along can mean more to ones heart that encourages one even more as we walk in faith." offered the one as she pulled the cash from a flowered flat wallet pulled from a pocket. She knew she was to do it as she positioned her ahead of her Sister in Faith traveling along this road tonight.  The casheir smiled as she had been catching a bit of the last interchange between the two of her customers.

     The crowd pushed them apart as they parted with a smile. There is a time when enough words are said as strangers pass in an intersection of life that warms both of them with faith in how Jesus can arrange our lives. It would have been so easy not to have made that first smile that opened up the opportunity for the question to be asked. It was an encouraging moment for both of them. The one had been praying on her way to work to be used to encourage another tonight. She realized she was a few minutes early and for some reason she felt thristy and to stop for a drink.

     As she sat back down in her car she opened her hand to put the change away. She had questioned the cashier about the change due to it felt wrong but the cashier smiled with a smiling nod and a wink. The cashier had given us both a discount with the drinks. There was three in that fellowship meeting with one already at work behind the counter. A blessing that warmed more than two in a few minutes of time.

  Creative mind I did enjoy as a child. I could make up a story to entertain others in a group and was called on to do it. I remember a group of kids in a booth as we passed the time as our parents talked together after church  or a meeting.  I was amazed how the ideas could pop into my head of things to tell which kept others entertained.

   As a teenager, I wrote plays, skits, puppet shows, and short stories like it was second nature. I enjoyed reading and could fill a library card front and back in 9 weeks. My creative mind with fed with others creativity which inspired me even more.

    College years, I still could come up with skits for our Bible Study to drive a point home or advertise an upcoming event. It was fun to brainstorm with others. I helped many come up with subjects for papers and outlines. Actually, a journalism scholarship for two years of college help me get started but realized it was not my path. I began to get blocked which is not good when a deadline looms near.

    Later as the years passed the creativity seemed to be choked out by the demands of life. My career allowed me to see life in a different way and dreams of childhood did not come to pass in ways I thought they might. Loosing the cattle, horses, and farm took away the  open skies of creativity. Life moves on as dreams and things one loves in life are removed without replacement with other dreams. Losing beloved family members that encourage, relate, and accept one in life begins to cloud over a once open clear creative sky. Watching ones take faith to make it a game of manipulations of control over others verses sincere faith that encourages others and prepare upwards toward eternity. It can kill creativity or even the openness to creativity.

     Yes, I enjoyed encouraging others in life but as I listened it was not to be shared. Yet, recently challenged to write again and inspired by others who remind me of how I could write at one time. Realizing I have been around a few decades in different places could allow it to be safe to write again. Yes, still distracted by what life can throw ones way and the need to sleep for a refreshed mind of creativity. In this background you can find how much a sky still means to me as I keep it for  years and still take pictures unshared of skies over the years.

     A gift is a gift to be used or lost over time due to lack of use. Faith has to be practice to grow or it just fades away with lack of use. Life is to be lived with hope which makes it far sweeter than just to exist.

     I enjoy a trip as I try to gain a normal day schedule to make the most of it with those around me. Yet, one must return home to resume life. My life is one of work at night for 12 hours. I do enjoy it all these years as it is a time when people realize they need help. Yet, during the day things appear less scary to one compared to night. There is a since of alone and fear to call a friend to wake them from their peaceful sleep. That is where they call us to help.

     You never know the case it will be that can happen to somebody during the night. A young married girl post minor surgery walking two miles before she calls due to her husband believes she is makimg more of the situation than it is. She sees us pass by as she walks in the cold night with only a small jacket on in the wind that tears at her. Pain meds do not work if you can not keep them down or anything else. The cold helped numb her pain yet she felt weaker the colder she became as she walked in the direction of a hospital. Just a little concern from a husband at home may have prevented some of her frustration which complicated the problem. A little comfort and understanding can go a long ways.  Yet he refused to drive  her or allow her to drive.

    One call in the night amidst others which is worth it to me to work this shift. It is a time of day that can make one feel so alone despite how many wonderful friends they can have in this world. It is worse for the unselfish ones due they are the ones that don't want to bother others in life despite how many times they help others around them 24/7. Yet, forget that those they have helped wants to help them back when they need it too. It is a blessing to give and one does not want to deprive others of that blessing also.

     The first night back can be the roughest to work as the schedule sinks back the what I consider normal. Yet, what I get the privilege to see and encourage makes it worth working this shift. One can have a complaint but there can be so many more unspoken but seen through somebody that cares.  Yes, the inexperienced ones can work the night shift but they need ones that there to guide them too.