May 8, 2008

• Learning Dependance vs independance

       (conti from previuos day) In few seconds I went from being the one trying to help another on a scene to help keep them safe as I was calling 911 dispatch on my cell phone to being the one needing the help. Yet as the impact hit my cell phone was gone from my ear and hand and was found after the impact on the trucks back bumper near the center where one would put a ball hitch. The phone was resting there without obvious damage a few inches from where my fingers would reach as somebody found it and handed it to me. I use to for years helping my patients not being a patient in need of help!

      I was transported with the only fracture found being my lt knee cap(patella) with an open laceration  requiring surg. in the morning as I was told that there was a lot of soft tissue injury. God had protected me from so many other possibilities of injury from that sort of impact. No fractures to my back or hips as bruising and swelling started! As I felt my back side I thought about the Proverb " For whom the Lord loveth he correcteth, even as a father the son in whom he delighteth" 3:12. My parents did not believe in sparing the rod growing up as my Mother had made that area painful many times while growing up when my Father was out working on the farm. My body was sore all over as time passed. Yet, again, I was happy to be alive and knew God wanted me on this earth for a reason as this could be a lesson in life that will help me further down the road. Iknow God does want the best for me and is fair in His dealings. Yet, I don't understand things at times.

       How many times, do I think I'm in control of my life like the scenes at work I work? Over and over in the Bible "Trust in the Lord".  Trusting the Lord is being dependant upon Him to take care of me. No it does not mean I sit on the couch eating Bon Bons waiting on God to do it. Yet, it is about a dependance in seeking the Lord daily using my freewill to chose this instead of going other directions. Life gets busy and was I seeking as much as I should be for God to direct my steps? Had I become too busy? I still have many questions I'm asking and learning things other than the questions I may ask. 

      Yet, being injured, home bound by Doctors for awhile due to issues in healing allows me to no be independant. Being in the hospital those days with limited movement as my overbody was healing from soft tissue injures as it continues to do so now. Basic life activities, I needed help with which were things I took for granted I did daily. Yet, I still knew God protected me from so many other injuires and death. He has a plan for my life and I have time to study in the Word and pray to discover more of it and prepare my heart for it more.

       How many people I know do not know what will happen to them when they die? How many  more am I still on earth for God to allow me to encourage?  I will only learn answers to questions by being dependant on God not my own independance thinking I'm in control of things. We all can slip into it despite seeking to Trust the Lord fully.  We are instructed to pick up the cross daily, pray without ceasing, rejoice, forgive, and many more as I know I can improve in all of those. God gave me freewill to chose each action I do and for who's glory it is for!

       Being slowed down, I'm able to learn more about faith and dependance on the Lord to trust Him that much more with more of my life that I seem to keep taking back in a tug a war at times. I'm learning more trust and being able to listen better. Yet, so far to go! I praise God for those praying for me as God is answering those prayers! I praise God for healing me! I'm learning/reminded to ask my Heavenly Father to help me in functions of daily life I never actually thought about asking Him to help me before. "In all things" has taken on a new meaning! When I am weak, He is strong! Praise the Lord!

  • 5:53 am
  • 3 Comments