I have a few of those first Spring flowers that like to bloom first. To see the buds come out lets me know it is spring. Spring is season of new birth and change. Each season has its own change to it but Spring as so much Hope to it for me. There is just something to seeing beautiful colors come out of the ground that has been brown for months.

     First day of Spring here, we had a snow that put a couple of inches or so on the ground as my first bud appeared. Did the flower bud open? No. Yet, a few days later another batch of them has like 12 buds! I'm going to see those first flowers bloom yet! To me the first ones are the most exciting which puts a smile on my face each time I pass by to go out or come into my home.  God's creation in wonderful colors bloom!

     Even in our personal lives as we live we can be so expectant of God's blessings. Yet, sometimes, what we can expect to happen can be postponed. Yet, postponed in God's timing can be blessed even more! I must admit the snow was beatiful in its own way. I'm not in control of the weather, God is.

     I try to give God control of my life as my pride, faith, and self allows in the choices each day. No matter what happens, God works things out despite what happens. Yes, I'm being reduntant in my words due to we need to say, read, and most of all apply them despite the tempation not to live it. He has His timing and there are so many ways to learn no matter what happens.  

     First day of Spring and we get snow!!! Life is far from boring! Wind brings amazing things to us including snow! I praise the Lord I'm not working in it this weekend. Yet, I my shift has been on quite a few storms this last winter. I'm willing to share the weather!!!

     Storms in life can hit but there is still beauty in them like a snow storm. We have an opportunity to learn so many new things and in ways test to become stronger in faith. An opportunity to present itself to see how much more amazing the God we serve is!! Yes, patience is huge when it comes to God's timing. Yet, when God's timing is right, we can be ready!!!

     Paperwork came in the mail today for the Census. We are legally required to fill it out. We are to be counted for various reasons. They say it helps us get funding from the government depending on how many people there is in a location. It does many things. What does it mean for those who lose people?

     Not all places to be counted are mandatory. The Book of Life, it is a person's choice to be counted there. Yet, the reward for being counted or to have your name in that Book is far more rewarding for all eternity. Yet, again, not to be counted in that book.............not good for all eternity.  Yet, good news! The Word of God (Holy Bible) helps us live for eternity.  It even gives us an example of prophecy fulfilled during a time of census when Mary and Joseph went to Bethlem where Jesus Christ was born!

     Hebrews 11 gives a roll call of faith with people actually named and others starting in verse 35 are not named but where blessed despite hardships they faced in life where counted faithful. The reward  of  heaven at the end of life despite how horribly they were treated due to faith!!!! How many Christians in various countries that are not friendly to Christian in these times and through the generations. There are stories about them written down to inspire us to live stronger for Jesus!

     At the end of ones life ends the choice to be counted in the Book of Life. I pray people choose to be counted where it counts for all eternity!!!! 

     Encouragement can come from unusual places at times and people. Sometimes, I just want to do something that does not take much thought. I escape at times to a $2.50 second run movie theater. I just show up without much preplanning or otherwise if I thought about it too long I would probably do something else.  I don't keep up on the latest movies coming out or reviews due to there being so many more other things that catch my attention to do.

     I walked in with a movie called, "Legion" that was getting ready to start. It was action adventure which interests me more than other types. When it started, I wondered what did I get myself into. It seemed a little dark to start with but I stayed seated. When you pay $2.50 it is much easier to get up and leave a movie. I was not thrilled of the beginning but the mix of build up on the actors had me curious. One more simple hopeful one caught my attention due to his hope and positive outlook at the situation he seemed faced with. Watching the mix of charactors as it build had me curious despite not liking part of it. Yet, as the story unfolds it relates to the end.

     The writer of this movie had an age old question that I'm sure many have shared over the generations about what if God got fed up with all of us humans before Jesus's return. What this movie scriptual? No. The movie brought out how fake, self centered, corrupt humans had become to the point of wanting to wipe them out with Noah and the flood being an example of God's past frustration with humans.The movie used a lot of examples of attitudes and situations of mankind. People appeared one way in the beginning and can change later as the story continued with people admitting/confessing how they had messed up. Yet, some people don't change or their true colors show up despite what they appeared.

     Would I actively encourage others on a large scale to go see it? No. It is a movie out there that can be used to encourage others or do little for some. A friend of mine also saw it and was not impressed or nor received the same kind of encouragement I received from it. Yet, we both have done different things in life which can make a difference in our idea of it. God judges the hearts of people, not us despite how easily we seem to forget it. The movie showed angels in a bit different light but still showed them as being faithful to carry out God's will or mercy. They were not the soft, gentle warm fuzzy feeling type that humans like to portray them as at times. What if heaven turned against us due to our human corruptness in so many ways and lack of faith?

     The simple hopeful young man in the beginning of the movie that tried to encourage others despite his situation was encouraging to me as it was brought out in the movie that gave hope to another to make a stand. Sometimes, it takes one to stand for another or others with mercy for it to overflow from others to what is going on.  The movie used the weak to become strong even if they did not realize what is going on at the time. God can use anyone despite others giving up on them.  Again, I repeat, I would not use this as an example of a Bible story in any shape. Yet, for me it pointed out many little things to me as I have thought about it later, including days later. It even pointed out to me of what I first thought of the movie compared to what I thought of it afterwards. How many times can I do this with people even without realizing I'm doing it at times?

     We humans can be so hard on ourselves at times and lose hope and our faith due to situations that can come in life. We look at the situations around us to discourage us instead of focussing our faith in what God can do in our lives or lives of others. Are we just selfish in our living or out to encourage others despite what the situation around us looks like?  The movie was not "preachy" but led out in examples in action verses empty words like so many can be. So many humans that are hurting no matter state of faith don't want to hear "preachy" words but sincere words of hope in action and example that comes from sincerely living for God, so God can lead others to them to encourage them. Yet, again, it is the person choice of which direction they go despite the encouragement given.

     If somebody was frustrated with life and wondered how God can keep forgiving us self-centered humans, this movie could give them hope if they were looking for some hope. It showed mercy in a different way. It showed other things, too. Yet, it would have to be God working in their heart for them to take the next steps to chose Jesus to be Lord of their lives depsite all the distractions of this world. The very last scene still showed the human way to take care of things but it did show the change in the charactors.Yet, would one expect Hollywood to show people reading the Bible and praising Jesus at the end of a movie? 

       The movie did not really use scripture references but for those of us that know them, it would remind us of many of them. God's Word does not return void. There was a charactor with obvious faith who recognized part of the situation who encouraged everybody they needed to pray verses just human reactions. The scripture we hear in the past can be applied to what we see and hear everyday in life as we seek Jesus and encourage others.

      The main charactor looked so weak and under valued by some of those around him, yet in the end was strengthened due to the faith, hope, and encouragement he showed toward others in the beginning. He caught the attention from heaven due to it his weakness and faith. What does God do to the weak who have faith in Jesus as they live their lives to glorify Jesus?  Yes, God makes them strong for His Glory and will not give us more than we can handle.   Praise the Lord that is patience and love with humankind continues His mercy and grace toward us despite how awful and fake we can be in our lives with Him.

     "What is faith? It is the confident assurance that what we hope for is going to happen. It is the evidence of things we cannot see yet." Hebrews 11:1 NLT

      God works in our lives in ways we cannot see with our human eyes. With our human eyes and dealing with the world we can forget that there is a spiritual battle going on also.  When God starts blessing and a difference is being made for the kingdom of God for His glory, do you think the enemy will stand quietly by?

      God can start blessing and then you name it can happen. I know I can get so frustrated and I'm not alone in this. The attacks can from from areas right close to us and even at a distance affecting those we can be working with for God's glory also. Things can look lost at times. Frustration to the point of hurt can creep in which destroys the faith we are standing on. Frustration and hurt can grow in us that can create a blindness in Faith to see God is still working.

      Somehow, someway, we must chose to stop ourselves in our tracks of this cycle of frustration and hurt we can be in to open our faith again to be able to see again and stand in faith. I have been a KJ or NIV girl most of my life.  A dear older and wiser friend sent me a NLT new testament like my Grandmother use to read daily in the last years of her life here. Sometimes, we can read the same words over and over as we can become dull to them at times especially when frustration hits. I read the words, "confident assurance" which hit me in my heart.

      God is still working and working in others lives despite times that can be so interesting you don't even want to talk about due to one does not want to be discouraging. Yet, the love is still there. Wind is still blowing, yet we can not see it but it is still there. We may not know exactly what is being said or how it all works. Yet, we can see the little things and hope to learn more despite the time it may take to figure it out. The place where it goes and comes from can by a mystery but it is there. God has those answers as He had created so much in creation and plans for us in this world.

      Faith must be stronger than the frustration that we have for us to grow and not be held back. God has His timing for things. We humans can mess things up by choices we make out of frustration which leads to hurt and blindness in our lives which can lead to more poor choices which creates the cycle of more frustration and hurt to more blindness.  We are the ones that must chose to stop the cycle in our lives. Others may be able to encourage but it takes each of us in our own mind and heart to chose faith verses frustration.  Faith opens us up to see so much more and continue in God's plans for our lives. 

     Praise the Lord when we chose faith over the pain of frustration!!!!!

     In high school and college during traditional years of life was a time retention of what I would study was wonderful. I took that for granted in ways until now.  A couple of decades later, the retention is not the same with me.  I realize there are so many more things in my life compared to then.

     Yet, the exciting part compared to now and then is that their is actual experience to put with the book this time verses learning the book for the experience to come. Relating is so much easier this time around as I can give various examples to what I read. In ways things make better sense. Yet, all those little steps and items remember is another challenge.  I have the concepts but I must memorize the details on how you get there. Plus, dig deeper to what I already know. It is cool to learn things deeper.

     College classes or the Holy Bible are things we can learn and apply to life. I will say the living life over the years do make the Bible come alive more and more also. You can relate more with it including the attitudes and sins people mess up with. When I was young I read it more as words, as I age, I can see myself doing these things as life is lived.

     With God all things are possible.  If I'm doing what I'm called to do, He will help me get it done. Jesus is my strength. When I was young "His strength" meant so much less than it does to this day.  Faith in Jesus that He can help me in all of it, not what I chose to give Him to help me in. Not just words to say but actions with applications. "Jesus is my Strength" is a few words but a lifetime to apply. 

     I thought I was busy before. Yet, I guess it was not enough due to I decided to take an online college class. Okay, for some of you these are old hat. Yet, to me, brand new.  I was your traditional college student years ago. I enjoyed the intereaction with classmates and the teacher. I would study the teacher and how he taught to figure out what was going to be on the test just like I studied the book for whatever would be on the test.  With an online class, how do you do that other half for the test?

    Hmmm..... that means I better study the book that much more!!!! I have three classes to take to get into a program that I want to be accepted into despite the competition around to get into it. My brain is not the sponge it use to be!!! Oh, memories.  Fast forward years ahead, I'm trying to remember the memories now! It is reality again.

     Retention?  I have found for me to retain what I study, I must seek my source of strength, Jesus, first.  I'm not alone. You are not alone. This actually works in all areas of life. How do we start our day?  Sometimes, I can cause myself to worry for no reason. Yes, take things seriously but relax at the same time. Relax, start my day praising and being thankful for how Jesus has blessed me. He is listening!

     I don't spend a lot of personal internet time due to life can be busy. Yet, I enjoy reading others instead of writing at times. There is so much to learn from people.  Sharing through writing is another way to see application of things.  Many times, reading and commenting is all that there is time for. Sometimes, I just get to a few blogs. Sometimes, I read and may not totally agree but there is something to learn and even challenge me if I don't agree. Why? I ask myself these questions which creates more subjects to pray about.

      I can learn through others experiences as we can go through similiar ones which can be so encouraging. Some blogs can get me to thinking with some of those thoughts still lingering as I go to sleep. People can encourage each other so. Even bad examples or interesting things can still be encouraging in ways. It warns me directions I don't want to go or provide a mirror with an image I need to see to check myself. Prevention is important.

     Plus, it is cool to read God's Words that relates to what is going on or hear it repeated with what others are doing. It is cool when fellowship alone with God is similiar to what others are getting at times. It gives a family feel to it all in a literal sense. He is not MY Heavenly Father ONLY but ALL of OUR Heavenly Father that encourages all HIS Children. It is cool when we are being encouraged in similiar ways!!!!! Sweet Fellowship!!!!

     Over the last couple of weeks I have returned back to a church that I have not attended for a few years. Why? I don't want to go into due to I don't want to discourage people anymore from churches. Some think I'm crazy for returning. Yet, that is where God's forgiveness becomes real in living life. God forgives me and we are suppose to be like Him.

      There is a new Pastor there for aprox. a year. A neighbor that I had encouraged for years to come when I lived nearby the church found me as I walking out. She had been visiting once in awhile over the few years but had not seen me. She was told me she had been praying to see me again as I moved aprox. 5 years from that apartment complex where we were neighbors at. Over time, phone numbers can be lost.

     She was the one that introduced me to this new Pastor. What she said about brought tears to my eyes. I had tried to keep why I left quiet for the most part there. Yet, the ones involved knew. Yet, forgiveness has to be the forefront in my mind there. Each stray thought that is not about forgiveness must be rebuked/kicked out of my head.

      Setting an appointment time later, the Pastor, his wife, and I met to talk. They welcomed me back.  I shared the past without names to them.  Again, that is part of forgiveness. I had not joined another church in that time due to knowing that some of these members could spread rumors if I became active again. I realized for me to go on, I must confront the past and the enemy's work there. Humans are pawns.

      My Grandmother told me at a early age and kept telling me till she died in my 20's that there is a difference between a church and God. I did not step back from God due to my personal study and worship continued. While I stepped back it was a time to learn more and heal.

     Over the my lifetime, I have been referred to as a "rock" many times due to what abuse I have been able to withstand from people by those who witness it but stand there doing nothing about it. After it worst blows over, people come up and say nice things. Again, forgiveness has been building over time in my life in many ways. I'm thrilled to be a witness to people in what God can do, yet these attacks since childhood in various ways does leave wounds to scars. I'm not a rock.  God can heal. Yet, we have to let Him. The past attacks/battles have grown more interesting over time as I stand up for a person, people, or issues/values/etc.

     Stepping away has its own pitfalls which is another topic to write about. Yet, the ministry and people encouraged while I was there had continued in ways as a neighbor from the past encouraged me by an introduction I was not expecting. It was words I would not have said about myself verbally to another. It was a blessing. She recognized me for sure by my braid I wore then. In the last few years, I have worn a bun more than another style and almost did it that day. Yet, I changed it to a braid. Both of our prayers were answered that Sunday as we were both encouraged. God is good even during interesting times.